Flash Back To

the 80's! I was in Target yesterday and always have to browse the clothing section when a pair of jeans POP out at me. My first reaction is, "no way". No way can any designer or store think it is OK to bring back stone washed jeans! This picture on the site don't do them justice. I LOVE the 80's, yes I even love the music and style but it doesn't mean I would ever wear the hiddious styles. I am sorry but these are not something they should have gone back in time to copy!

Pack Rat

Oh good gosh do we have junk. Okay, maybe it's ME who has the tons of junk but no need to get all technical. One thing I don't really like about myself is the fact I have a very hard time parting with things. It doesn't matter what the item may be I can't get rid of it. I keep papers for YEARS and years thinking I just might need them. I found papers from elementary school, no lie! I find sentimental value in things and just can't get rid of them. I am so bad that next to the word pack rat in the dictionary you would see my picture. The last 4 days all I have done is organized stuff, tons of stuff! Between Ryan and I there was 1 LARGE trash bag full of shredded papers which took me an entire day to get through. Also, I have thrown away 3 other big bags of trash/junk and I have one HUGE trash bag full of clothes to give away. So 5 bags so far of things to get rid of which, in my eyes is pretty darn good considering who I am. Alright, time to get back to more organizing and such...

Saying Goodbye

If there is anything I HATE in this world it is goodbyes. Doesn't matter if they are goodbyes forever, goodbyes for a long period or a simple ta-ta for now, they all simply make me sad. Even as a child I can remember hiding my tears on the way home from the airport when we had to drop off loved ones. Today was no different. Today I had to say goodbye to Ryan. Yes, I will see him again but not sure of when. I don't know if there will be time before the six months or if it will be just that long. It amazes me how I only dropped him off at the airport 11 short hours ago but yet I miss him already. I then sit here and think of when we first moved in together and it was NOT so easy and how he drove me nutty. I am sure I drove him nuts too but lets not dwell on that. hehe Anyway, I was so used to certain things, my own way and most of all MY OWN SPACE! I wasn't used to living with a boy but yet I got so used to him and all his ways (well, the ones that I haven't changed) ;) As I sit here now all alone, I begin to laugh at how hard the beginning was for us but how hard we worked to get past all of that and how I just might miss all the Ryan things. It is weird to me that he will never come back to this apartment, our first home together and think how much things are going to change in the next year, the next few months even. If you know me you know how much I HATE change all most as much as I hate goodbyes but I am excited that today is the first day of a new chapter in our lives. We are off on a new adventure, not sure if its so fun right this second since I am doing so much organizing, cleaning, etc. but I can't wait for what is in store for us. So my Ryan, Ta-Ta for now and I will see ya soon in a new state and a new home! I am SO very proud of you and know you will do well in the acadamy!

Correction...

We were told today it isn't two weeks, we have ONE week!!! Ryan has to be in Tucson on Monday, September 22 for orientation. They then ship him on Wednesday straight to New Mexico to begin training! So we only have one more week. Also, the physical training is over December 15 but he has to stay until FEBRUARY 11 for training in Spanish! Two extra months and one more week! WOW is the only word to describe what is going on in my head! :(

Time is Ticking

I am not sure where to begin, the last 12 hours has been a blur. So on a happy note...it is official, I am moving back to Arizona! No, I didn't find a job yet (if anyone has one for a marketing/management major I would be grateful) but my boyfriend took a border patrol agent job and it becomes official as of tomorrow. I guess the process has taken so long I didn't ever expect it to happen. Time goes on as does your life and you forget about it. Then I had also had thought if they do offer the job to him we will have some time to figure things out. HAHA, yeah right!
So we had one night to decide if he should accept the job or not and if so he has ONLY two weeks to get his life organized to leave for training in New Mexico on September 28 until the middle of December. TWO weeks!!! Holy Molly this might be the most stressful, scary and overwhelming thing I have ever had to deal with in my short little life as an adult. So far I am not sure I like this adult thing and would gladly pay someone to make decisions for me. Stress, overwhelming thoughts about right or wrong, best vs. not is NOT very fun. I can't imagine what happens when you have kids to deal with as well! Anyway, to put it in an easy way here is a list of what is going to happen which, number one is the only thing we know! The rest is things we have to figure out. Oh God help me!

1. Ryan leaves in just two weeks for training in New Mexico.
We can't visit during the training so we will not see each other until the
middle of December!
2. We have to give a two month notice for our lease.
Stay or go we have to pay two months. So I am here for another two months all
on my own! I am stuborn and refuse to pay our landlords while not living here.
3. I have NO job as of this second and not a clue where to begin looking as you will
see in number 4 why.
4. We have not a clue where we will live when he gets out of training, actually we
have no clue on anything at the moment! Here are our options:
a. We both live in Ajo, AZ. Yes, I said Ajo! One of my options is to live
in a town that sounds like an abbreviated bad word! It is in the middle
of the desert, so that means the middle of no where. To give you an
idea, as of 2000 there were less than 4000 residents because it was an
old mining town and now is mostly a RETIRMENT community. There are NO
neighboring communites and has just ONE SMALL grocery store. They don't
even have a Wal-Mart or McDonalds! Every American town at least has
those! Yeah, that is what I thought. It has ONE Pizza Hut and ONE drive
through window (Dairy Queen). So I see myself being bored as dirt! Yes,
DIRT! But on the bright side I can tell people I
live in a town that means garlic! :( Oh come on, I am trying, I really am
trying to think possitive!
b. We both live in Tucson which is about an 1 hr 20 min from Ajo, just one
way. That is what the commute would be for Ry after 10-12 hour days.
Here at least I would be able to get a descent job,but the commute would
be hard for him and I would have to give up living in the town of garlic!
(eye roll)
c. We both live in the Phoenix area which is about a 2+ hour drive one way
which might just kill the one who is doing the commute everyday!
d. We live separately for a little while. He lives in Ajo and I in the
Phoenix area so I can get a decent job/career while he works on his. He
comes home on his off days. Doesn't sound too bad considering we
wouldn't see much of each other anyway with the long hours his first year
anyway. The downside is...
5. He has to keep this job for 1 1/2 years to pull ranks and is able to transfer to something else.
6. No negotiations on salary, it is what it is.
7. It is VERY dangerous and thanks to my mother I am a worrywart. The pay does NOT equal the danger of the job. Thank you US government for that.

So, that is just the surface of what is going on. Lucky you I didn't give details but we really don't know what the future holds. We don't have a clue if this is a good choice or the right one. We really don't know what is the next step. Those of you who know me know I like organization when it comes to life, HATE major changes and like a detailed, concrete plan. I might just lose my sanity with this chapter in my life but other than that all is wonderful! Will keep the blogging world up to date and just have one question...
Seriously, who said being an adult was fun?